Christmas Wrapping

With reasonably well-paid jobs people are in the very fortunate and secure positions where, if they need to do something or buy something they can. It may be taking a taxi every Orange Wednesday to the hospital, replacing the buckled wheels on their mountain bike after being knocked off, or (once the loan is in your account) buying a car on Switch. That security makes life difficult when it comes to Christmas.

Exchanging presents is great - but how do you buy for people who, if they need something, can go out an get it? My heart goes out to the people who, this year, have wanted to give me a Christmas gift. We don't really need anything, and the only things that we do want don't fit within a happy £5 to £10 bracket - except books, inner-tubes, and cans of WD-40 (I'm being selfish here). I am notoriously ungrateful and very specific. If I'm interested in a cycling top, don't assume I'm interested in the Lance Armstrong 10/2 top, or a replica Eddie Mercx or Tom Simpson top, assume I want the beautiful designed-in-Scotland made-in-Italy merino wool cycling top that I've emailed you the web-link for. For Christmas this year I received a beautiful designed-in-Scotland made-in-Italy merino wool cycling top from my wife, a cycling magazine subscription and very smart tie-and-cufflinks from my parents, and some camera accessories from Susannah's dad. Best of all, though, have been the Oxfam Unwrapped gifts doing the rounds this year. I was given a donkey by Susannah - even though I already have a big fat ass, and we received a goat from Susannah's brother and his wife. Oxfam Unwrapped polarises opinion.

One opinion is: it's worthwhile to give what you would have spent on someone else to others on behalf of that someone else and, instead of them feeling awkward, wondering what to do with that Best of Charlie Dimmock DVD or Tower of Pizza coffee set, they will be filled with a warm glow of generosity knowing that they've inadvertantly contributed to making poverty history and giving independence to the opressed.

The other opion is: what do you think you're doing giving my present to someone in Africa, I want a present, and if you are going to give a cow to some flies-on-the-eyes family then I want to know who they are and where's my present.

Oxfam Unwrapped polarised my Christmas Evening in exactly this way. For the record, I was very glad to see so many animals, school desks and dinners, and medical packs going to so many who needed them, whoever they were. I don't care - especially because it saved me from feeling awkward, wondering what to do with that Charlie Dimmock DVD and Tower of Pizza coffee set.

Neil - checks his list twice